eeeeek!!! i feel like running around and pulling all my hair out. I have never wanted a job so much in my life....and tmw at 1pm it will all be determined. i'm praying that i have a kick-ass interview and mr. you know who thinks i'm fabulous and decides i'm the only one for the position. let's hope he gives me a lot of money too :)

i've resisted getting a j-o-b for so long.. and i'm really tired of driving all over for 2/3 hours here and there trying to get enough hours. i'm over it. i want a regular paycheck, a regular commute and benefits... tired of trying to do things differently/going against the grain. think i'm finally growing up :) here's to me getting that manager job tmw!

took my new laptop to work for the first time in my fancy new chrome messenger bag (not a laptop bag... no padding..can we say dumbass?!) and well it fell on the sidewalk and nowthe laptop is dented and the cd player is not loading correctly! ACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and, the only reason I dropped it is because my damn hand isn't strong enough because of all my nerve problems. SOOOO irritated.. i've been so careful with it... treated it like it's my freakin child. :(
Sad, sad day!

bringing home dinner unasked and making a run to 7/11 for ice cream when the girlfriend has a craving.

i decided i need more music.... i guess what i actually need is access to the music i already have, so i am beginning the all-consuming digitizing project.
my goal is a few cds each day and i should be done around january next year. ha!

all my ani difranco music disappeared when the laptop was stolen in the neighborhood carjacking heist and i haven't had a chance to download anything until today. i have really really missed her. in fact, she is one of the first musicians i've developed a bit of an obsession about since i was a kid.

there is just something about her music...it is absolutely amazing...it reaches down to the core of my being and awakens something primal... the rawness of the lyric/tone/voice blending together is art at its finest. she is brilliant and i'm so happy i get to listen to her til my little heart's content.

interesting....so much has changed in the last couple years.. then again, if you take a look around my life, it seems nothing is different. working on a saturday. going to a cpsoa event tonight to watch the most amazing kids on the planet.

i'm interpreting law school.. yes, that's right.. LAW school. have i mentioned i have no legal experience whatsoever?? then, again how does one get experience for something like interpreting law school without actually doing it? i'd actually be excited about it had i started at the beginning of the quarter rather than 2 months into classes, and were i not trying to apply to grad school by dec. 1. URGH!!

apparently i have a knack for spotting celebrities everywhere i go... i suppose it might have something to do with where i live and work, but they seem to walk right passed me when i'm in the most random places...and it's always stars from my favorite shows. for example, leisha hailey walked by on my way out ofkinkos... she even gave me one of those sly little smiles (you know, the i-am-you-are-one-too smiles). then, the other day i'm standing in line picking up tix to see a movie and the one and only, kate moennig is standing right in front of me. have i mentioned, i'm addicted to the l word.

i'm a little embarrassed to mention this last one, but i just fell in love with the show, and i won't be ashamed to admit it...so you think you can dance. today, while i was walking across the parking lot into starbucks, travis and ivan drove by in their little suv.

said the old lady before she hung up with me....this was for the video relay service gig...hmmm, guess that's what happens when i'm in a butch mood. yay! hormones haven't completely destroyed me. it was oddly soothing...comforting even... made me feel like i'm still me. I felt seen and understood. it's not that i want to be a guy or even feel like a "man." but i definitely feel like i'm "other" inhabiting the space between the worlds in some androgynous land where gender is more fluid. regardless, i thought it a strange reaction; i used to get pissed.

it's incredibly difficult doing anything when it's this hot. it wouldn't be so bad if i could just relax and let myself be, but after planning a full weekend of cleaning and decluttering, it's tough letting that go. it would be even better if we had posicles. i was so excited by all the progress we were going to make... it might even get clean enough to invite people over.
but, i have my limits, and i have no desire to sweat like a pig today...i did enough of that this morning at the hollywood farmer's market. thanks to my love for introducing me!! today was my first time and although it was a scorcher so we didn't stay very long, it was amazing meeting the people responsible for growing the food. it felt good supporting the local farmers, knowing this food really is organic and that it is so much more nutritious than its grocery store cousins. so far i've had an apple and a couple of strawberries and wow!! not only do they taste better, but i'm actually eating more mindfully... probably has something to do with having met the farmers and respecting the work that went into creating and cultivating the food.

miss my zoomzoom :( but, he'll be back on 9/8.
oh.. did i forget to mention i had an accident?? well, i have to admit...every time i thought about it, i just couldn't face telling anyone i'd hurt myself again. having a catastrophe every month is getting old. i'm feeling very 'not fun' to be around.

i was "following too closely." story of my life. i was exiting the freeway when some idiot swerved in front of a couple cars in front of me... they were able to stop; i wasn't. the front car was dented, mine didn't look too badly hurt, and the middle was totaled. turns out, mine had $7,800 in damages. can't really understand why they bothered fixing it instead of classifying it totaled. guess it WAS worth more than i thought.

with my insurance rates skyrocketing, looks like i won't be buying a new car anytme soon.